Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: What's this all abo...

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: What's this all abo...: Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: What's this all about then? : Well, I had yet another one of my weird dreams again last night...

How not to lose the Menaces

I finally finished knitting the Dennis the Menace Jumpers, and we set off for Blackpool.

there's no chance of any of us getting lost and not found,

The jumpers went down a storm, lots of folks admired them and they were even more impressed to learn that I had knitted them all.  I had to do some research after someone asked if we were Freddie Krueger or Dennis the Menace.... I haven't and never will see Nightmare on Elm Street.

Suffice to say, the Menaces had a grand old time and love their trademark jumpers

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: What's this all about then?

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: What's this all about then?: Well, I had yet another one of my weird dreams again last night...... Billy says I'm a Numpty, it's not my fault.  Anyway, in thi...

Gormless or Gormless?

I'm deaf right, so I have a flashing light system in the house to let me know the phone is ringing or someone is at the door..

I have put a note on the front door because people knock and I don't hear them so consequently I miss important callers ie repair men or deliveries. This is very frustrating and anger making for me. 

Today I nearly s**t myself when I heard what sounded to me, like a wall being demolished. I rushed to open the front door to see what happened and, as Lord sugar would say "the bleedin' postman' is standing there clutching a large parcel. We'll I gave him a flea in the ear..... Now, I wonder if my notice on the front door isn't quite visible ? 🙈

 

A vicious circle

I started to wake up with a feeling of dread every morning, I didn't want to get up and go to work.  I felt I didn't give a damn if I got the sack, but I knew that I did give a damn but didn't care or did I?  I couldn't be bothered.  

I thought of my husband getting up every day at daft o'clock to go to work and I used that thought to make an effort and go about my business.  I was managing to keep the tears at bay, didn't know why I was going to cry and felt like shit most of the time.  I managed to keep my head above water and plod along.

Today, it is my son's birthday, a happy day, I wasn't going to be seeing him but we are on social media and keep in touch and we spent Friday together, had lunch and a laugh.

Today, Sunday, I woke up with a big black shadow pressing in my gut. I didn't want to get up, I didn't want to go swimming as planned, with hubby.  I just wanted to sleep and sleep.  I told hubby how I felt and he was great, he gave me a cuddle and went to make a cup of tea.  I turned over to go back to sleep and then I thought of him downstairs being so good and I made myself get up and go and join him.  I drank my tea and we went to get ready for swimming.  I still had this big black shadow bearing down on me but I made an effort to get in the car and go to the leisure centre, where I smiled back at people and said hello and I thought to myself, if only they knew how miserable and sad and heavy at heart I am feeling, but I just carried on going through the motions.

In the swimming pool we swam two lengths and I had to stop, the big black shadow became a massive panic attack.  I was terrified, I haven't had a panic attack for many years.  I started to cry quietly and told hubby. Again he was great and comforted me, he asked me if I wanted to go home  I did some yoga breathing and recalled one time when I was in this same dark place, my Doctor gave me a sick note for 2 weeks, he said "go and do things that make you happy and come back and see me".  I told this to hubby, and seeing as how I was in the swimming pool and swimming makes me happy, I chose to stay and finish the session.  

After the session I was still below par but functioning a bit better, we went shopping to look for a winter coat for me and the panic attack went away but I still have this big black shadow resting inside me.  There is a massive waiting list for my therapy so I am going to have to rely on my inner strength and my husband, to get me through each day.  God bless him and thank you my love xx

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: No! No! No you couldn't make it up

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: No! No! No you couldn't make it up: I had a fantastic time in Scarborough with my beloved husband, Billy, we had a WoWcher for a 3 course meal, bed and breakfast and were pleas...

No! No! No you couldn't make it up

I had a fantastic time in Scarborough with my beloved husband, Billy, we had a WoWcher for a 3 course meal, bed and breakfast and were pleasantly surprised with a free bottle of Pinot Grigio with our meal.  There was however, ONE blot on the landscape.

On Monday afternoon, we went to the hotel pool for a swim, the water was lovely and warm and relaxing, we had the pool to ourselves great you think, so did we until the fire alarm went off and we had to evacuate the building, it's a good job we always take our flip flops with us isn't it?

When we emerged from the bowels of the hotel to the main entrance without seeing a soul, it was a bit eerie, but then, through the double wide open front doors of the establishment, we saw a whole bunch of staff and guests across the road waiting for the all clear, all eyes were on the two of us in a both wrapped up in towels that could have done with being much larger, we were shivering, wet and cold, it is soooo windy near the sea.

You can believe it was an ice breaker ha ha.  A member of staff gave us a load of silver "blankets" to wrap up in, sadly there was a battle with the wind and the won, it was playing kites with the blankets so we didn't feel the benefit of them.  We had a happy ending though, because on returning to the hotel we got fresh, warm, dry towels and went straight back into the warm and welcoming water for a good 45 minutes.

In all the hotels we have stayed at in fifteen years, we have never so much as heard a fire alarm, never mind have an evacuation....... let's hope it never happens again eh?

Today's WOW moment

At work today a colleague pointed out that a child had put play dough in her ears, "Oh, she always makes earrings and diamond necklaces," I replied.  My colleage said "No, she's making hearing aids like yours, it took me a minute to realise what she was doing at first."  Than another colleague confirmed this was true.  Well, I was flattered.

Ten minutes later half a dozen children, boys and girls, were wearing play dough hearing aids to copy me.   It just proves that these under 5 year olds do listen to the answers when they ask the questions.  I wonder how they will react when they realise that their hearing is not so good when wearing the play dough?  I'd better prepare for the questions hadn't I?

It does pay to complain

Well, well, well, having become sick to death of ringing call centres and being unable to understand what my options are for 1, 2, 3 etc. and after pressing * not understanding, yet again, what my options are, I have begun to complain directly via Email, to the MP in charge of each service that I find impossible to deal with.  First it was the DBS (which took 12 weeks to process) then the DWP Minister got emails asking why deaf people are not given the option of communicating with Government Services by email.  I sent my email to every person attached to the Ministry of Work and Pensions.  

I must say I was very disappointed when Damian Green MP, the Minister for DWP replied just to ask for my post code, nothing else just that.  What a bummer.   However, three weeks later I am very happy indeed, I am receiving correspondence from Job Centre Plus and the DWP via Email, yes Email, halleluiah.  Sadly, I cannot reply to said emails as I am informed, the system is not set up yet for that kind of correspondence, so I am just getting emails giving me instructions to follow and I am to respond to said emails via my local JCP until two way correspondence is active.

Oh well, it's a start and it's a lot less stressful for me, so Onwards and Upwards I say.   Watch this space!

DWP take the biscuit

Having finished the Tribunal case, my employment ceased at the company so in August 2016, I found myself making a claim for Job Seekers Allowance.  Having spent almost 30 minutes on the telephone registering my claim, I was very impressed with the woman I spoke to, she actually rang my local job centre to book an induction loop for my appointment, then called me back to confirm that indeed, there would be an induction loop set up for me when I arrived.

When I arrived for my appointment I saw the "ear" sign on the front desk, this indicated that indeed an induction loop was installed, super smashing great, NOT, ha ha bloody ha, yes you guessed correctly, that's all it was, a picture of an ear.  When I switched my hearing aids on to the loop nothing happened and in response to my inquiry about said loop, I was informed that there wasn't one.  So I asked "Why not?" I knew for a fact that one had been requested for me.  No acceptable response was given so I made a complaint in writing.

I received a reply to my complaint with the excuse that most of the staff were new and were not familiar with the induction loop system. I was not at all impressed and said as much.  I let it be known that every time I sign on for some benefits I am confirming something, as deaf person, I will be prosecuted if I sign and am found guilty of lying about my circumstances.  The induction loop is meant to help me to hear more clearly and eliminate some of the misunderstanding.

I then complained to DWP and received an email saying that in future there would be an induction loop provided for me at all my appointments and thanking me for drawing attention to the need for equipment for people with all kinds of disabilities.  The chap who sent the email assured me that he wanted everybody to have all their needs met.

Well, I started my new job three months later in November and still the induction loop had failed to materialise.  Why am I not surprised?  Now we hear that DWP are closing a whole load of job centres down, and people are going to have to travel further afield to sign on.... So it strikes me it is no wonder my induction loop didn't materialise because it looks like redundancies are looming for the DWP staff and I hope to goodness they suffer from being treated like lazy bastards that can't be arsed to get up and find a job - poetic justice is what I say!

Black Female Authors: Mixed Up Maxie Being Me!

Black Female Authors: Mixed Up Maxie Being Me!: About the Author Maxine Ann Bailey I am very happily married we have a son. My husband and I enjoy travelling and holidays abroad, ...

Oh Nooo

We set off for our week long holiday in Wales and had been travelling on the coach for about an hour, one of my hearing aid batteries died.  Typical….I rummaged in my handbag, no spares. I rummaged in the hand luggage, no spares, I rummaged in the back of my mind only to realise that it hadn’t crossed my mind to pack any, “Dear Lord, I hope the other one doesn’t pack in or I’ll be buggered”.  I said, fortunately, the other battery lasted a week so I was only half miserable.  Why oh why is it only Bank Holidays and seaside holidays that these things happen?

Not again....

Pardon

"Have you ever been rude to somebody or accused someone you know of ignoring you when you have let on to them in the street?  I bet it never occurred to you that they were deaf..... did it?"

It isn't always funny.....

WHY

I can’t abide the way people are led to believe that a hearing aid cures deafness when in actual fact all it can do is make what you can hear louder, even with all this new technology and modern hearing aids that are so much improved since the days of the ear trumpet, and now hearing aids with what I call ‘surround sound’ (I can hear behind me) I still hear wrongly and I still miss out if the subtitles are not on the telly, I am still deaf!

Anyway, all of this made me feel quite angry.  I was surprised that it was anger that I felt and after taking a long hard look at myself, I decided anger was the correct term so I decided to write about my personal experiences and show how being deaf is so much more than not hearing and impacts on all aspects of my daily life and how I finally overcame the shame and embarrassment of being deaf,

Mixed Up Maxie Reviews

I really enjoyed it and found it was written in your own imitable style, very amusing all the way through, tear jerking at times and very informative about the way a deaf child feels about the world and people around her whom she can't understand and therefore getting the wrong end of the stick and consequently getting into all kinds of trouble as a result. (June C)

Although it depicted some very sad, cruel and frustrating times in your life, it also illustrated how resilient you are as an individual and how important humour can be especially whilst dealing with adversity. (Janet G)

It is very good. Sad in parts obviously, funny in others and very thought provoking. (Denise D)

(Available at www.lulu.com)

If only Adults were so considerate

I was in the kitchen, Henry Grephew was in the living room, he was talking to me and I don't know what he was saying. I said "Henry, I don't know what you're saying,   GrAunty Maxine's ears are broken". Straight away Henry came into the kitchen to talk to me. I showed him my hearing aids and since then he comes to me and says "Maxine" before he talks to me. He's a little diamond.

Read Me.....

What's this all about then?

Well, I had yet another one of my weird dreams again last night...... Billy says I'm a Numpty, it's not my fault.  Anyway, in this dream I am driving my car someplace, (no idea where or why) when I reach the end of a road where I must turn left or right.  Now I see in my rear view mirror that there is a car right behind me and I say to myself don't start honking your horn, I'll go in my own time.  

Suddenly the car starts juddering a bit and a light comes on the dash board, I have never seen this light before, I haven't got a clue what it means so I put my foot down harder on the gas pedal and manage to get the car going forward albeit juddering and shaking.  I looked at the dashboard to see if the light was still on when I saw that the top of my legs were bare, I did a double take and looked down at myself and saw that I was completely naked.  I also realised that the car was now driving properly, nice and smooth and I asked myself what I was going to do about covering myself up as I didn’t want to be arrested.  It then occurred to me that I wasn’t particularly upset or embarrassed, very, very strange state of affairs indeed.

 I became aware that the driver of the car that had been behind me was beeping and waving at me.  Since my car was now driving normally I decided to risk stopping and seeing what the driver wanted.  I found somewhere to pull over and parked up.  I didn’t get out of the car, I put the window down and saw a man get out of the car behind, he walked over to me and handed me a large bath towel.  “I thought you might appreciate this,” he said as he passed it through the window.  “It might save your blushes and stop you getting arrested”.  He wasn’t laughing at me or staring, he was just being very considerate.  Wow that’s a first.  I thanked him and holding the towel carefully; I stepped out of the car and wrapped the towel round me.  The man had disappeared and so had his car when I got back into mine.

I continued to drive for few minutes the car was behaving and I was continuing on my journey, destination unknown.  Suddenly the car juddered to a halt and no amount of sweet talking or trying to start her up was working.  So, tying my towel tight above my bosoms, I got out of the car and started walking.  I was walking down a tree lined street with a few large houses dotted here and there, when suddenly a woman called out to me.  I looked round saw her holding on to a bicycle so I approached her and she told me to take the bicycle as it would help me on my way.  I was surprised as she did not seem to mind that I was only wearing a towel…… strange……

Having ridden the bicycle for a while, I came across three youths, one of them was giggling and staring and the others pushed him and told him to belt up, then they looked at me and one of them said “your towel is coming off”.  I looked down and saw my bosom was not covered, why was I not embarrassed?  Casually I covered myself and secured the towel.  I thanked the youths and carried on my journey to goodness knows where.

After a while I was knackered from riding the bike, so I parked it up against a wall.  As I was walking away a young woman appeared from the house, she called to me and motioned me to enter the house.  I had nothing to lose; I didn’t know where I was or where I was heading so I followed her into the house.  Inside the house was another woman, they told me they ran a fashion business selling original items and also carried out repairs to clothes for their clientele.  I was offered a cup of tea and shown the clothes they sold.  Unfortunately, the stuff was not to my liking.  One of the women left the room, to return with a lovely top that had a matching hat, it was right up my street, sadly it was not in my size.  I thanked the women and set off to continue my walk, about three hundred yards later I noticed I had forgotten my towel.  Why was I not bothered?  This was really weird….

  

I have no idea how long I had been walking when I met a female friend, I don’t have a clue which one but she said to me, “I just passed your car, where are you going?”  “Where is my car?” I asked her.  We talked as she walked me to my car, what we talked about I have no idea.  When we reached the car I got in and started it up, straight away she purred into life and my friend walked on.  I drove for a while and eventually found myself at the home of an old woman, I vaguely knew this woman.  She lived alone and enjoyed being visited as she rarely saw anybody.  However, today my niece was there with my Grephew and they were all pleased to see me and STILL nobody seemed to notice that I was NAKED for goodness sake.

We all visited with the old woman for a few hours playing with Grephew and chatting over cups of tea and when we were ready to take our leave, the old woman got up and left the room, on her return she was carrying something, she approached me and offered it to me, it was a coat.  She said “you might feel the cold on your way home, take this.”  And I still don’t know what it was all about.

Thank goodness I'm fully dressed

The Onesie abroad - Kayaking - Our Adventure

Well it was a super duper Bank Holiday weekend for Billy and me.  We set off for Anglesey, it was hot and sunny enough to have the roof down on the car, and we left the house much later than planned, then whoops.... a quick stop at Asda for some items forgotten by me, not Billy!

Finally we arrive at our destination, check in and wait for Denise and Martin to come and join us to plan the activities for the next day, which would also include Murphy, their lovely, very friendly dog.  We decided on some sightseeing and Kayaking followed by BBQ n Booze............  Well, I would be lying if I said I wasn't scared of getting on the kayak, but you can't have an adventure if you don't do new things,  so my cow onesie in my bag, I joined the rest of them for the sightseeing and kayaking.  

When we reached the cove where the kayaking would take place, I donned my cow onesie and much to my amazement I discovered that I had been afraid for no reason at all.  Unlike boats, the kayak didn't move a millimetre so I lost the "fear" and I was thoroughly enjoying the pleasure and thrill of paddling round in circles, occasionally going in a straight line, when suddenly, my kayak started bobbing violently on the water and my word did I scream.... the people on the beach could hear me. I was petrified, however, the kayak was soon floating very gently again and Denise informed me that the passing boat had caused an undercurrent making the kayak unsteady.  So I didn't let it put me off and I sure will give kayaking another go.  The kayaking, the sightseeing and the company were absolutely top Notch, thank you Denise and Martin we love you xx

Hope

Each and every one of us is a gift and like all gifts,

some of us are cherished, loved and treasured, others

are left broken and unwanted, like old toys found in the garden,

discarded because of ‘Imperfections’

Some are passed on to those less fortunate,

 others, neglected, unappreciated left to fend for themselves,

forgotten, beaten, abused, lonely and friendless

while others are hidden away, kept ‘secret’

Now, we can rage against this unfairness or

turn the other cheek and dust ourselves down, go forth and

spread a little happiness, leave massive foot prints

in the hearts of those who are lucky enough to cross our path

Remember, you can choose your friends but not your family

believe in yourself, never stop picking yourself up and

dusting yourself down but above all

have faith in yourself

                                              

                                                                                        Maxine

My Book "Mixed Up Maxie being me!"

well I have finally completed writing my book, it's taken four years and a lot of hard work and now it's finished and I have published it on lulu.com, I'm not quite sure how I feel about it all. anyway, on the plus side all the people who have read it for me have agreed that it really does highlight some of the trials and tribulations that come with being deaf and the lack of understanding of how deafness affects people.

the paperback is available at lulu.com or Amazon

Available at www.lulu.com