Gormless or Gormless?

I'm deaf right, so I have a flashing light system in the house to let me know the phone is ringing or someone is at the door..

I have put a note on the front door because people knock and I don't hear them so consequently I miss important callers ie repair men or deliveries. This is very frustrating and anger making for me. 

Today I nearly s**t myself when I heard what sounded to me, like a wall being demolished. I rushed to open the front door to see what happened and, as Lord sugar would say "the bleedin' postman' is standing there clutching a large parcel. We'll I gave him a flea in the ear..... Now, I wonder if my notice on the front door isn't quite visible ? 🙈

 

A vicious circle

I started to wake up with a feeling of dread every morning, I didn't want to get up and go to work.  I felt I didn't give a damn if I got the sack, but I knew that I did give a damn but didn't care or did I?  I couldn't be bothered.  

I thought of my husband getting up every day at daft o'clock to go to work and I used that thought to make an effort and go about my business.  I was managing to keep the tears at bay, didn't know why I was going to cry and felt like shit most of the time.  I managed to keep my head above water and plod along.

Today, it is my son's birthday, a happy day, I wasn't going to be seeing him but we are on social media and keep in touch and we spent Friday together, had lunch and a laugh.

Today, Sunday, I woke up with a big black shadow pressing in my gut. I didn't want to get up, I didn't want to go swimming as planned, with hubby.  I just wanted to sleep and sleep.  I told hubby how I felt and he was great, he gave me a cuddle and went to make a cup of tea.  I turned over to go back to sleep and then I thought of him downstairs being so good and I made myself get up and go and join him.  I drank my tea and we went to get ready for swimming.  I still had this big black shadow bearing down on me but I made an effort to get in the car and go to the leisure centre, where I smiled back at people and said hello and I thought to myself, if only they knew how miserable and sad and heavy at heart I am feeling, but I just carried on going through the motions.

In the swimming pool we swam two lengths and I had to stop, the big black shadow became a massive panic attack.  I was terrified, I haven't had a panic attack for many years.  I started to cry quietly and told hubby. Again he was great and comforted me, he asked me if I wanted to go home  I did some yoga breathing and recalled one time when I was in this same dark place, my Doctor gave me a sick note for 2 weeks, he said "go and do things that make you happy and come back and see me".  I told this to hubby, and seeing as how I was in the swimming pool and swimming makes me happy, I chose to stay and finish the session.  

After the session I was still below par but functioning a bit better, we went shopping to look for a winter coat for me and the panic attack went away but I still have this big black shadow resting inside me.  There is a massive waiting list for my therapy so I am going to have to rely on my inner strength and my husband, to get me through each day.  God bless him and thank you my love xx

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: No! No! No you couldn't make it up

Maxine's BBbitching 'N' Stuff: No! No! No you couldn't make it up: I had a fantastic time in Scarborough with my beloved husband, Billy, we had a WoWcher for a 3 course meal, bed and breakfast and were pleas...

No! No! No you couldn't make it up

I had a fantastic time in Scarborough with my beloved husband, Billy, we had a WoWcher for a 3 course meal, bed and breakfast and were pleasantly surprised with a free bottle of Pinot Grigio with our meal.  There was however, ONE blot on the landscape.

On Monday afternoon, we went to the hotel pool for a swim, the water was lovely and warm and relaxing, we had the pool to ourselves great you think, so did we until the fire alarm went off and we had to evacuate the building, it's a good job we always take our flip flops with us isn't it?

When we emerged from the bowels of the hotel to the main entrance without seeing a soul, it was a bit eerie, but then, through the double wide open front doors of the establishment, we saw a whole bunch of staff and guests across the road waiting for the all clear, all eyes were on the two of us in a both wrapped up in towels that could have done with being much larger, we were shivering, wet and cold, it is soooo windy near the sea.

You can believe it was an ice breaker ha ha.  A member of staff gave us a load of silver "blankets" to wrap up in, sadly there was a battle with the wind and the won, it was playing kites with the blankets so we didn't feel the benefit of them.  We had a happy ending though, because on returning to the hotel we got fresh, warm, dry towels and went straight back into the warm and welcoming water for a good 45 minutes.

In all the hotels we have stayed at in fifteen years, we have never so much as heard a fire alarm, never mind have an evacuation....... let's hope it never happens again eh?

Today's WOW moment

At work today a colleague pointed out that a child had put play dough in her ears, "Oh, she always makes earrings and diamond necklaces," I replied.  My colleage said "No, she's making hearing aids like yours, it took me a minute to realise what she was doing at first."  Than another colleague confirmed this was true.  Well, I was flattered.

Ten minutes later half a dozen children, boys and girls, were wearing play dough hearing aids to copy me.   It just proves that these under 5 year olds do listen to the answers when they ask the questions.  I wonder how they will react when they realise that their hearing is not so good when wearing the play dough?  I'd better prepare for the questions hadn't I?

It does pay to complain

Well, well, well, having become sick to death of ringing call centres and being unable to understand what my options are for 1, 2, 3 etc. and after pressing * not understanding, yet again, what my options are, I have begun to complain directly via Email, to the MP in charge of each service that I find impossible to deal with.  First it was the DBS (which took 12 weeks to process) then the DWP Minister got emails asking why deaf people are not given the option of communicating with Government Services by email.  I sent my email to every person attached to the Ministry of Work and Pensions.  

I must say I was very disappointed when Damian Green MP, the Minister for DWP replied just to ask for my post code, nothing else just that.  What a bummer.   However, three weeks later I am very happy indeed, I am receiving correspondence from Job Centre Plus and the DWP via Email, yes Email, halleluiah.  Sadly, I cannot reply to said emails as I am informed, the system is not set up yet for that kind of correspondence, so I am just getting emails giving me instructions to follow and I am to respond to said emails via my local JCP until two way correspondence is active.

Oh well, it's a start and it's a lot less stressful for me, so Onwards and Upwards I say.   Watch this space!

DWP take the biscuit

Having finished the Tribunal case, my employment ceased at the company so in August 2016, I found myself making a claim for Job Seekers Allowance.  Having spent almost 30 minutes on the telephone registering my claim, I was very impressed with the woman I spoke to, she actually rang my local job centre to book an induction loop for my appointment, then called me back to confirm that indeed, there would be an induction loop set up for me when I arrived.

When I arrived for my appointment I saw the "ear" sign on the front desk, this indicated that indeed an induction loop was installed, super smashing great, NOT, ha ha bloody ha, yes you guessed correctly, that's all it was, a picture of an ear.  When I switched my hearing aids on to the loop nothing happened and in response to my inquiry about said loop, I was informed that there wasn't one.  So I asked "Why not?" I knew for a fact that one had been requested for me.  No acceptable response was given so I made a complaint in writing.

I received a reply to my complaint with the excuse that most of the staff were new and were not familiar with the induction loop system. I was not at all impressed and said as much.  I let it be known that every time I sign on for some benefits I am confirming something, as deaf person, I will be prosecuted if I sign and am found guilty of lying about my circumstances.  The induction loop is meant to help me to hear more clearly and eliminate some of the misunderstanding.

I then complained to DWP and received an email saying that in future there would be an induction loop provided for me at all my appointments and thanking me for drawing attention to the need for equipment for people with all kinds of disabilities.  The chap who sent the email assured me that he wanted everybody to have all their needs met.

Well, I started my new job three months later in November and still the induction loop had failed to materialise.  Why am I not surprised?  Now we hear that DWP are closing a whole load of job centres down, and people are going to have to travel further afield to sign on.... So it strikes me it is no wonder my induction loop didn't materialise because it looks like redundancies are looming for the DWP staff and I hope to goodness they suffer from being treated like lazy bastards that can't be arsed to get up and find a job - poetic justice is what I say!

Black Female Authors: Mixed Up Maxie Being Me!

Black Female Authors: Mixed Up Maxie Being Me!: About the Author Maxine Ann Bailey I am very happily married we have a son. My husband and I enjoy travelling and holidays abroad, ...