Florida - A lucky break?

We have just returned from a fantastic holiday in Florida, I stayed with my Uncle Keble, it's the first time we have met him,  my cousin Polly and her husband Leslie, came from Connecticut to stay with us for a week and we all went to meet cousin Mel, aged 87, we spent three hours listening to him tell us about the origins of our family on my Grandmother's side and we made a family tree of seven generations starting with a slave named Mimi Briscoe, who was freed from slavery at the tender age of 12.  Mel also kept us in stitches with tales of his life and travels starting from Jamaica and moving to the UK before settling in Florida in the 1980's.  We drove down Alley Gate Alley and Snake Road to  visited my Aunt Maxine in Charlotte County and met numerous cousins, and we all went tovisit  Grandma's grave.  Then we enjoyed a stay in a Motel with a heated swimming pool and Herons in the garden, before heading back to Miramar,

We also discovered that Uncle K (Keble Drummond & the Cables) isn't the only celebrity in the family, newly discovered cousin Marcia J Ball is also a singer worth listening to

We will be meeting cousins in London next year and we have an invitation to stay with Polly and Leslie, and meet more family in Connecticut which we have accepted and shall go in 2017 and shall then fly to Florida to spend some time with Uncle K and look in on the rest of the Clan while we are at it.  it's all very exciting....

    

          

Have suitcase, Will travel

me and my other half are having a great time arranging our holidays so that we can travel abroad to meet family members who were just names on christmas card or people talked about over the years and never met.

first stop was New York where we met an Aunt, an uncle we didn't know existed and and eight cousins.  We also discovered a wonderful shop called 'Bed Bath and Beyond.....  Had our picture drawn in Central park and enjoyed hours of fun and walking in Manhatta
n.  Hubby went right to the top of the Empire state building while I (coward) waited almost two hours for him in the souvenir shop on the second floor.

Next we booked our flights to Jamaica with a three hour transit stop over at Atlanta and made the most of it by arranging to meet a cousin and have lunch with her at the airport before continuing on our merry way to Jamaica to visit my (never met) Grandfather's grave and to meet more family, known and

unknown.  It's always a pleasure and so good to be able to put names to faces.  Our next trip is getting closer and we will be flying to Miami, Florida, to meet an Uncle never meet, see an Aunt not seen for many years and meet cousins never met before.  We are getting quite excited, it's two adventures in one each time, A new country and and fresh new faces I can't wait.

Fun & Games

One of the lads' teams struggling to get coordinated

Well it was that time of the year again - The Annual Bailey Family & Friends BBQ.  Guests ranged from 23 months to 82 years old, and this year was another roaring success.  we had the Ski race, four teams and here are just two of teams (I wasn't so lucky this year I was on the wrong team and not in any of these photos)

Don't step over the line.... 

Children taking part

All the children had such a smashing time

The winning team with the trophy

We also had a  "NOT" the Cube challenge I must say there was quite a bit of competitiveness going on and much laughter and fun, even the little ones joined in

Children taking part

     

Don't step over the line.... 

     

Children taking part

winners of "Not" the Cube

The BBQ was a delight of home made kebabs and beefburgers (thank you Billy) and the rain eased off making way for a lovely sunny afternoon, thank you mother nature and everyone who came and took part in making it such a success Muchas Gracias 

Response to a request for Deaf Awareness at work

What does this Mean... Anybody????

In terms of the Deaf Awareness training I explained that I had something similar a few years ago and while I can see why you would want your colleagues to attend I'm not sure this is the best solution. All of your colleagues are aware of your hearing difficulties, but I do accept at times they may forget and this could appear to you that you are being omitted from the conversation. I think we agreed that this is not an intentional act by anyone but simply people forgetting and my view is, if these occasions do happen in the future a quiet word from yourself to the person(s) would yelled the best result. My view in this was reinforced when explained that at times you have to remind your friends outside work of your deafness.

Amazing What a difference 3 words can make

So, I request a meeting with my Regional Manager and my Line Manager as I have issues to resolve.... Well "I leave these things to my Managers to deal with and if they cannot be resolved I will then get involved".  Replied the Regional Manager.

So after a meeting attended by just my Line Manager and me,  I ask my Line manager for a copy of her Minutes to be made available to my Disability Rights Advisor, And LO five minutes later I get word from the Regional Manager that the meeting is null and void and he will come and have a meeting with me (no one else, just him and me) to see if he can "Get a clear picture of 'how I see the problems'. Well, Well Well!!

DISCRIMINATION OR NOT??

Once a week I go swimming with my son, we have been going to the local swimming pool for 25 years and we have a great time laughing and messing about between our average ten lengths of swimming.  Swimming is from 12 -1pm but we are usually late and get about forty minutes, minus the time chatting to people we bump into (not physically) in the water, people we haven't seen in years.  Now both my son and I are deaf and not once has there been a complaint about the amount of noise we make as we cannot swim wearing out hearing aids, at most people come to see what is so funny and at least they just smile as they swim past us.

Now then, on the other hand I have been working in my current job for three years (wearing my hearing aids) and not once in all this time has any member of staff had cause to tell me that I am speaking a bit too loud, or so I thought, there I am merrily working away with all the candidates having a bit of a chat and greeting them at reception taking ID and details without a murmur from customers or colleagues.  Then WHAM!! During my one to one with my Manager she told me that she has noticed that the busier we get, the louder I get and asked me “How are we going to address this?”  I was mortified and feeling under pressure I said that I would ask my colleagues to tell me if I get too loud.  Well this didn't go down so well in practice as it did in theory and I ended up very unhappy and distressed.  My confidence evaporated and I every time I started to talk to a customer I was so conscious of not raising my voice that I stopped being chatty and friendly.  My husband and my son wanted to speak to my Manager about it but I said no. I would deal with it and I looked up some disability in the work place organisations and support groups and my husband spoke with his company's union rep and with all the information I gathered I wrote an email asking my Manager to arrange a meeting for her, the Regional Manager and myself.  The Regional Manager said he would not come unless my Manager could not resolve whatever issues I had.  Anyway, surprise, surprise it was my colleagues complaining that had caused my Manager to speak to me.  She told me that my colleagues didn't want to upset me by saying anything.  I was appalled to hear this because I actually asked some of them if they found me to get too loud and after hesitating they had all said not at all…………..

I couldn't believe it; by not saying something they have caused more upset than by doing the decent thing and having a quiet word with me.  To cap it all, not only have my colleagues also stopped working with me on the reception desk, by finding some online training or other 'jobs' to do that keep them away from the reception area while I am there. I let my Manager know that I am keeping a diary of things happening at work that don’t seem right to me.

I am also very aware of the camaraderie between the other staff, I can see thmm on my cameras, grouped together talking and I can hear their voices as they talk and laugh and I feel isolated and excluded. I have been told about a night out that is being arranged but I haven't been invited which tells me they are probable too embarrassed to be seen (heard) with me.  I did think I was being a bit paranoid but not anymore, not now that I have confirmation of the complaint about my loudness.

During my meeting with my Manager she mentioned the fact that on my annual self-assessment I have reported that I have never had a risk assessment in three years and she has arranged for me to have one later this month.  I am waiting for this meeting to find out why there hasn't been any Deaf Awareness training as this could have pinpointed issues such as my volume when in a loud environment and how to deal with it.  I think it is too little too late as my colleagues have already 'weighed, measured and found me wanting'.  Finally, my Manager asked me why I was not at the Christmas Meal and I told her "I didn't come because I am not part of the team".  The Manager wasn't happy and tried to tell me that I am part of the team but I know I never will be because the "team" has badly damaged my self-confidence and I will never be able to feel like one of them.  Meanwhile, I shall wait and see what the outcome of this sorry business is and keep my head down while I do my job to the best of my ability. 

Colleagues like these!

I hate it when I have nightmares about going to work because some colleagues blow hot and cold and leave me feeling sick with stomach cramps.  This cannot be right, can it?

only the other day a certain colleague was all smiles and cheer when she came to do the tea round.  Than WHAM one hour later she is 'on one', sullen and totally blanking me when I spoke to her and then she spent the rest of the shift behaving like I was invisible.

Another colleague is abrupt, rude or indifferent when you speak to her, flapping her hands at you like you are an annoying fly that she is swatting.

How should one react to this kind of behaviour?  I really don't know, but I do know that I love my job and can't contemplate leaving.

We work with the public so a showdown is unlikely.  When I have used my conflict management to try to resolve the issues I am met with incredulous responses such as "I have an illness and I suffer pain, but it's none of your business and I don't have to tell people".  Err, I beg to differ, what is wrong with telling people you are having a bad day? that is all it takes lady, no need to divulge anything else.  The other response is "I can't be doing with this".    Hello, who do you think you are?

I have a little ditty I sing to myself it goes "you mean nothing to me", repeat as many times as you need....

I also have a saying "Not my circus, Not my clowns".  sadly this does not always do the trick....  It is such a shame I can't tell these people to "Eat my shorts!!!"